6 Flirting Tips for Guys | How to Flirt as a Man
To get a girl(friend), you need to be able to flirt with her.
Sure, you can try to just walk up to a woman you find attractive and tell her that, but chances are that that neither party would appreciate it that much.
To get a girl to want you just as much as you want her, knowing how to flirt with a girl is essential.
How to Flirt With a Girl
But where do you start in this mysterious game of flirting?
More importantly, how do you flirt with a girl? There’s a simple three-step formula that we like to use.
First, you want to make yourself presentable. This means looking the part, from your clothes to your skin.
Second, you want to make sure the girl feels comfortable. This means giving her space to be herself while also showing that she can trust you.
Third, you want to be attentive. Listen to what she has to say. She’ll appreciate that you’re keeping an open ear to her words.
While these three steps may seem easy to follow, there’s more to it than the formula.
There are also some other tips and tricks that you’ll need to know. Therefore, we’ve composed a surefire, six-step process to flirting as a guy.
Let’s get started!
6. Make Yourself Presentable
Let’s get it out of the way: nobody likes the hobo look.
That said, you should never compromise your own style, but rather find something that you like that also looks presentable.
Whether it’s a graphic tee or a button-down shirt, finding the right fit can make all the difference in the world, especially when it comes to first impressions.
Speaking of first impressions, you also want to feel confident in your own skin.
5. Keep the Conversation Light and Playful
Flirting is all about building some playful tension and making both parties want more.
You’re not going to accomplish that by starting a conversation talking about who you or your parents voted for.
Instead, focus on more general, fun topics that will keep both you and the girl at ease.
Talk about common experiences, your favorite vacation destination, or whether you’re a cat or dog person.
As time flies, you’ll both be more comfortable and can potentially move into more serious topics.
4. Make Her Feel Comfortable
If there’s one thing that’s absolutely paramount, it’s to make sure that your date feels comfortable and at ease around you.
At no point should she (or anyone, for that matter!) feel pressured into doing something that they don’t want to.
So how do you make her feel comfortable?
Avoid being too pushy, or getting too close if she’s trying to keep some distance. Listen to what she says (and how she behaves!) and react accordingly.
If she’s comfortable, she’ll let her guard down and feel at ease with you. Otherwise, realize when you should stop.
3. Listen to What She Has to Say
There’s an old joke where a man is on a date and asks a woman, after talking about himself for the past 30 minutes, “Enough about me, what do you think about me?”
That’s exactly what you don’t want to do!
Make sure you listen to her--and that you’re actually listening.
Studies show that by listening to understand and internalize what she has to say, you’ll strengthen the relationship and bond and make her feel heard.
After all, that’s what we all want, isn’t it?
2. Use Touch
Touch is a very powerful tool you have at your disposal when flirting with a girl.
In fact, studies show that a light touch made women more likely to give a man their phone number.
To build up the tension and escalate, make physical contact when flirting.
The key is to start slowly (and innocently) so she can choose to reciprocate and you can gauge her level of interest.
If she reciprocates, you can slowly start to make bolder moves: let your hand linger on the small of her back, or make extended eye contact before pulling away.
Done right, it’ll drive her crazy--in a good way!
1. Be Confident While Flirting
Above all, make sure you exude confidence.
Having some nerves is completely understandable, but nobody finds a stuttering, nervous wreck attractive.
Project confidence without being too cocky, and it’ll make a world of difference when it comes to flirting with a girl--and will hopefully help you get her to kiss you in no time!
One thing is certain: learning how to flirt with a girl takes time, and there’s no tried-and-true method that works 100% of the time.
Give yourself room to experiment, fail, and succeed, and you’ll slowly learn what works best for you.
You’ll get there before you know it… so happy flirting!
Thompson, Jeff. (2012). Thin slices & first impressions. Psychology Today. https://www.stryx.com/blogs/skincare/how-to-get-a-girl-to-kiss-you
Doell, F (2003). “Partners’ listening styles and relationship satisfaction: listening to understand vs. listening to respond.” Graduate thesis. The University of Toronto Psychology Dept.
Guéguen, N. (2007). Courtship compliance: The effect of touch on women's behavior. Social Influence, 2(2), 81–97. https://doi.org/10.1080/15534510701316177
“Courtship compliance: The effect of touch on women’s behavior” from Social Influence, Volume 2, Issue 2, 2007, Pages 81 – 97